Well, last night I felt actually pretty good. Ate dinner well. Went to sleep at around 11:30pm. Didn't sleep soundly but slept pretty good to 5:30am. Woke up feeling really great. So I decided to hang out with Jack today. However, at one point Jack looked at me and said "Mom your face and neck are very red". It was just before that I started to feel like a weight was coming down on me. I thought I am doing too much. I am on the couch now. I am at about 80% now. Not bad.
I did find out that the HER2 positive result was a good result because it offers more therapeutic options in the long term with Perjeta and Herceptin. So that is good.
I have been processing all of this. Spending a lot of time thinking about what this all means because it is so easy to go down the "what if" road. It's self indulgent to think about it and it's inappropriate (for now)...
So, most often, these are my thoughts...I resolve to LIVE my life. I am getting well with this medicine. I am to feel good knowing that I am on the mend. I am to take advantage of feeling well and good times. I am to not waste time on sweating the small stuff or worrying about petty things or the "what if's".
I truly believe my breathing is already better which means it is truly working! Hot dog! Lol! We will take this day by day, week by week, month to month, year to year.
I continue to feel God's presence and guidance. I thank you for your love and prayers!
I know you are tough stuff, Amanda. My prayers continue.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great resolution! More of us need that resolution in our lives. Jack sounds like a very intuitive young man and taking the time to "hang out" with him is good.
ReplyDeleteOne day at a time! Keep up the good fight. It's worth it and so are you! Love, Mama Mia