Crazy lady

Well hello!  Good grief, you would not believe the rashes I am dealing with. I got steroids yesterday and I am doing better now. My doctor said to stay out of the sun. I promise you that I have stayed out of it. But what I think happened was about 3 days before treatment, I was in the sun and got a little red in some areas. Instead of my body healing a sunburn like normal, I think the chemo attacked any inflammation in my skin and made it worse like a 3rd degree burn/poison ivy. I hope this doesn't happen again, because I want to stay on this regimen.  If I have rashes like this, there is no way I can sustain it. So hoping these go away quickly especially before the next treatment. Steroids, Benedryl, cream, cooling packs are helping!

I went into the office today for a bit. It's good to see my peeps. But, I have to take one day at a time here. For example, next Tuesday, I am supposed to go to a meeting but it's also calculated to be the day I should start losing the majority of my hair. So, while I want normalcy, the fact is that chemo side effects complicates things. I am a very social person without much of a filter and this makes it easier in some ways because I am open to talk about it all. But it also makes it more difficult in some ways because I might look different coupled with everyone's concern for me can be a bit overwhelming for me and them.  So I am going to have to just figure this out day by day.

Emotionally, I am doing well. I had a hard day last Thursday that was draining. But I have been doing well with just little bursts of tears from time to time. The song "Thinking Out Loud" by Ed Sheeran makes me sad yet happy. It references 70 years old and damnit I want to live til I am 70.  So as you can see, emotionally I am probably realistically a wreck. LOL. But I tell you I am doing well overall. Haha!  This is cracking me up to write this. Usually I would rewrite this whole paragraph but I won't. I will give you the satisfaction of how crazy I sound and Chris says welcome to his world!!! LOL!

Sorry that I am not posting pics. I usually post from my phone and I haven't figured it out just yet. It wants to connect to google cloud pics yada yada yada.

Thank you for your love, prayers, support in all of this mess. :) Love you in this with me.